Merry Christmas! If you celebrate it. I’ve been away for a few days because it’s been busy leading up to Christmas.
I love Christmas and it really makes me upset that today of all days all my mind is wrapped in is the bad.
I’ve had a pretty shit year, people I’ve trusted betrayed me because they were manipulated by others, someone who was supposed to teach me bullied me and someone I cared about just decided to treat me like shit.
There’s still a lot of anger there and I want it gone. But I’m re-entering that workplace and my best friend lives with the person I cared about. Every time I go see her all I feel is anger and resentment and I want to say ‘I want nothing to do with you’. They say hi like everything’s okay. When in reality it’s not and I don’t know want to speak to them. A lot of people left a hole in my heart and I refuse to go back.
So on this day, this blog post is really a representation of me letting go. I will no longer sabotage my happiness on days I’m supposed to celebrate. People treat others like shit but that’s a reflection on their own character. I need to let go of everything. Was I made a fool of? Yes. But, was it my fault? No. It’s okay to be the fool when you’re thrown into a world you don’t know. Everyone goes through it and all we can do is learn from our mistakes. I am 21 and I know now all the lessons I learned will be put to good use. It’s better to learn it earlier on in life than later.
Regardless of what everyone celebrates, I hope you have a good day. That’s it for now, signing off.