Inspiring People

The Importance of Self Care

When our mental health takes a down turn, self care tends to be one of the first things that are effected. Though, this can be detrimental to our mental health in itself. It’s very easy to neglect ourselves and in doing so, we lose sight of who we are.

Recently, I ordered beauty products. I struggle with saving money so I thought I’d regret it, yet I didn’t. The ritual of washing my face and applying toner and serums has brought me more joy than I’ve expected. It’s a great feeling to take care of yourself and I’ve even started to look forward to it. Waking up and seeing my fresh skin everyday feels great. So, why do we stop taking care of ourselves when we feel down?

The effect of neglecting self care

Mental health issues can arise from insecurities and anxiety, in particular, likes to play on these insecurities. For depression, that hopelessness can cause people to shut down and in turn, it’s hard to look at ourselves. So, when we are struggling mentally, we tend to abandon self care routines. But this has the opposite effect in making us feel better.

I understand it’s easy to think focusing on ones looks is superficial. Owning lots of clothes, makeup, skincare or even Botox and cosmetic surgeries can be viewed as a want and not a need. That if we own a lot of these items or do undergo modifications then we must be materialistic and only focus on our looks. Society did a great job at teaching us this. But if we go beyond that view of superficial, we notice that it’s about confidence and feeling comfortable in your own skin.

Confidence

The way we present ourselves not only shows confidence, it makes you feel confident. When we feel confident, we feel comfortable in our own skin. The anxiety about our insecurities can be reduced. And don’t get me wrong, it takes a lot of time to feel confident in yourself. But it’s the steps in self care that eventually lead to this confidence. It’s progression from hating yourself and your body to being in control of how you look and feel. By control, I mean the clothing you wear, the makeup masterpiece you create (makeup is an art), the exercise you do if you want to achieve muscles or even a bigger booty. We have a lot more control in our body than we believe and working for it helps us see that.

The process of working for what we want, shows us we have control in our lives and it aids in the journey to recovery. A lot of the time, I felt like I had no control. While it may not work for everyone, I told myself I did have control and I put the effort into self care to show it and now, I love my body more than ever. Don’t get me wrong, it depends on my mood but overall I’m incredibly proud. I’m hoping to do an update fitness journal soon and share some tips. Regardless, these activities create a sense of control in our lives where we feel there is none.

Self Expression

Both fashion and makeup, are fantastic for self expression. There’s nothing quite like expressing your personality through your sense of style. This can be in the form of cheap or expensive clothing. It doesn’t matter the cost of the material items, what matters is that you are expressing yourself.

Self expression also goes hand in hand with confidence. If you’re expressing yourself, you feel more comfortable and confident. While anxiety can deter this, wear what you’re capable of and feel great doing so. It will take time but the more comfortable you feel, the more likely you’ll be to explore your style.

Where can you start?

I myself don’t know much about skin care. But I know a couple things. One, is that it is by no means suited to only one gender. Men can have a skincare routine and many do. Products don’t discriminate between gender. Secondly, you know your skin the best. If something works, keep it. You can add to it if you’re searching for more. In terms of where to start, r/asianbeauty on reddit has a great skincare guide and you can choose based on your skin type. Asian beauty products are amazing and leave your skin feeling vibrant.

For style, look at what inspires you. Wear what you feel comfortable in but it’s also okay to be brave. You can also look to people who inspire you. This is in terms of style though, a lot of celebrities have unrealistic bodies and please don’t compare your body to theirs. We all have different body shapes and there’s nothing wrong with that. If that’s something that triggers you, be cautious of that.

If exercising is your thing, Chloe Ting on YouTube provides great routines which make you sweat. These videos also help you to gain muscle so I’d definitely recommend them. But even simply going for a walk would count as self care. Walking helps people mentally and physically. Mentally, you can reflect and understand your feelings more. Physically, it gives you some physical activity to keep you healthy.

This post mainly covers physical forms of self care and this is by no means limited. You can also have mental self care and I think I’d like to explore that in its own post.

Thanks so much for reading!

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Inspiring People

Self Expression

Self expression is important for reflection. In a way it helps the mind to set thoughts and feelings free. The act of writing, drawing, amongst other things helps a person to observe the feeling, emotion or situation. Observing it in another form rather than in your brain is a great way to grasp how oneself sees the pains. I sort of lost my way recently in terms of why I draw and write. It’s easy to become focused on likes and comments. While I love to help others and I’m sure many people do, sometimes we need to remember to focus on ourselves and express our emotions. So, let’s explore ways to express ourselves.

Writing:

Writing is a great start. Creating a character, a scene or anything for that matter expresses the state of ones mind amazingly. Writing has so much symbolism in it and you can truely tell when someone has felt pain through words. If writing isn’t your thing, reading can definitely help in understanding emotions.

Some examples of amazing literature that show the human condition incredibly well:

  • Wuthering Heights. It shows how one can love someone so much yet still let status and pride guide them.
  • Harry Potter. While this author has been disowned by fans. The writing is great and it demonstrates too many themes to cover.
  • Poetry by Henry Lawson. He was an Australian poet and the imagery he creates in The Water Lily is truely beautiful.
  • Poetry by Rosemary Dobson. Again this poet is Australian and creates fantastic imagery in her poetry.

Art:

Drawing, painting or whatever type of art you prefer can help with reflection. It’s creating a story within a usually stagnant piece of work. Art can take hours to do as well so it’s really bringing one back to the art piece and helping them to think. I don’t have any favourite artists so please recommend some to me! I’m always looking for new inspiration.

Photography:

I previously tried getting into photography and my family as well as some classmates made me feel stupid. Never feel stupid for learning a skill, especially one that creates a scene for you. I’ve started trying to photograph again and it’s really calming to just take photos of things that love and inspire me. I definitely recommend it! Luckily Instagram has made photography accessible, so it’s quite easy to find someone you connect with to inspire you.

Baking:

Baking is great! The entire process not only gives one time to think but it creates something delicious to enjoy at the end of it. When you bake a cake or make a pie you can also decorate it and I’ve seen some truely amazing decorations. What better way to express yourself than decorating a cake and eating it afterwards!

Your Style

Fashion exists for a reason. It’s self expression. Days when people feel uncomfortable they choose safer clothing. Days when people are happy they tend to put more effort in. Our style is a reflection of who we are and it’s great in terms of positive self expression. So why not dress up and do some photography, it’s amazing to feel good about oneself and express that.

A common theme amongst all these activities listed tends to be creativity and it really does tie in with self expression. So look for inspiration and create for yourself. It’s okay to let others guide you and inspire but don’t compare to others because everyone’s unique in how they express themselves. I know I’ve missed a lot of stuff to try and these are just some I have personally experienced, so let me know, what do you do for self expression?

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Inspiring People

Changing Mindsets

Something I’ve struggled with lately is changing my mindset. I find that my view on something changes in relation to my mental health. For example, when I am struggling with my mental health, the bad things in life become painful, as if the universe is trying to make life harder. In this post I want to explore ways to change mindset and to remind myself, as well as others that shit happens.

Challenger Your Thoughts

Changing mindset is a mental battle and simply telling yourself that the universe isn’t out to get you and bad shit just happens can go a long way. Earlier this year when I felt I wasn’t in control of my actions and was stressed about it. I would tell myself ‘I’m in control’ every time feelings of anxiety arose. Eventually it gets in your head that you are in control and no one around you can truely control you.

I believe this is manifestation in a sense. We can manifest our positive mindsets because we are telling ourselves. If we were to wait for things to go right than we’d be waiting a long time, because life is full of obstacles.

Consume Positive Media

I cannot stress this enough. Today I was watching videos on body transformations and while I have a positive body image currently, seeing these peoples transformation was making me feel the need to step on the scale. I tend to be terrified of the scale and it was having a negative impact so I had to switch it off. Obviously we ourselves define what’s negative media for us, but it can have a profound effect on our mood and mindset.

Walking away from something triggering can be difficult, especially with algorithms always throwing it in our face. Try to avoid it though if you feel particularly vulnerable, because a negative mindset can be exhausting.


Looking back, I think these are the biggest factors in changing my mindset but it’s different for everyone. Every once in a while it’s nice to reflect because everyone does forget what helps them to think more positively.

Thanks for reading!

Inspiring People

Romanticising Your Life

Recently, an idea that has become popular on tiktok is romanticising your life. While this notion sounds well, romantic, I’ve discovered I don’t entirely know what it means. Any attempt I have made has left me with some sort of anxiety, coming to the realisation that I’m not romanticising anything.

So naturally, to understand it, I googled it and to romanticise your life is to:

Being present and aware is the key to romanticizing your life. Pay attention to what is going on and be determined to be a part of it, even if it isn’t physical.

Herculture.org

While this seems simple enough, it’s quite difficult. Through trying to romanticise my life I’ve found I do so many things to avoid living in the present. For example, I like to put on a perfume that reminds me of the place I brought it – Japan, a place I truely feel connected to. So, is living in the present really key to romanticising life?

Initially, I thought it meant doing things you enjoy and manifesting happiness through your actions. Simply putting on that perfume made me happy. The concept inspired me to be spontaneous and try new things. That was my idea of having a romantic life. While the idea of romanticising life is great, I think it’s up to the person to create their own definition of romantic. We are the main character in our own lives, so it’s up to us to act like it.

I think the idea is fantastic, if we create our own definition of romance. If we don’t we can allow anxiety to arise because we aren’t living a life that someone else wants. I felt sad because I’d see everyone else’s romantic life and think, ‘I don’t do that’. Only when I stopped and visualised what the concept meant to me, was when I could truely romanticise it and now the days seem peaceful and enjoyable.

Thanks for reading! I’ve been on a bit of a hiatus because I was sick, but I’m back not to do some writing and can’t wait 😊

Inspiring People

Creating a Safe Space

It’s hard to express your thoughts, especially when telling someone. Often at times you don’t even need to voice them, just write or draw them. Something that really helps with expression is a safe space. While there are formal definitions, for me it’s a place where I can store my thoughts, feelings and desires. For example, a journal or a blog where you post poems. Expression is a great tool to connect with others but also yourself. Which is why a safe space doesn’t need to be somewhere everyone can necessarily go, it’s for your mind only. Some ideas:

  • A corner in your bedroom. Decorate it and make it comfortable. Then go there and write, draw, reflect or anything you desire.
  • Create a folder on whatever platform that you can use as a journal or somewhere to keep your thoughts.
  • A note book, to draw or write, something you can just carry everywhere with you.
  • It could even be a whole room where you do your hobbies and create.

The purpose of these spaces is to take yourself away from the big scary world just for a little bit. In doing so you can process and understand your emotions. Personally, my room is somewhere I can relax away from the world, write poetry and draw. At the end of reflecting I feel better and know that it’s going to be okay when I return to the big scary world.

Thanks for reading! I find it quite hard to take myself away from the world to reflect and focus, so my mind often wonders when I’m trying to work. That’s what inspired this post and I hope it encourages or reminds someone go visit their safe space.

Inspiring People

Mid 2020 Reflections

It’s finally the second half of the year, and like most people, I’m counting down the months until it ends. Despite this, I’ve learnt and grown a lot this year, so I want to share these lessons in hope others can reflect.

  • Focus on yourself. You can’t please everyone because it’s exhausting, do be kind to others but not at your expense.
  • Forming new habits takes time and energy. You need the willpower to do so and it’s bloody hard. I managed to successfully learn one new habit this year out of the many I’ve tried. It takes time and if you want it bad enough you’ll get there!
  • Fitness and healthy eating go hand in hand, and it also effects your mood significantly. Healthy eating is hard and so is exercising. This pandemic has made it even harder for some to do both, and I think the greatest effect its all had is in my mood. Which is why I’ve started doing little things to stay active and I’m feeling great.
  • I am in control. Everything I want to do is up to me to do it and no one else. Lack of control is scary and we sometimes don’t realise that we are in control. That’s why I remind myself of this every so often.
  • I need to play my part in social and environmental issues. It can’t go ignored anymore because racism is still prevalent and that’s not on. In terms of the environment, there are hundreds of small easy things I can incorporate into my life to increase the chances of a better future. So I’ve learned the small things to do my part. I may not have a loud voice yet but I can still do the little things.
  • The future is scary but it’s not set in stone.
  • Live your life like your the main character. Because you are. No one else is living your life, so go out there and achieve your goals.

These are just a few lessons learned and I’ve found they were greatly influenced by a lot of events that happened this year. While it has been a long and eventful half year, let’s hope the second half is better. And I’d love to hear any lessons you’ve learned this year!

Inspiring People · Uncategorized

Tips to Resolve Insomnia

As someone who has suffered anxiety, I have felt with insomnia quite frequently. There’s nothing worse than lying in bed for hours, alone with your thoughts, not able to sleep. Now, these tips may be a little different to lying in bed and counting sheep or telling a story, but they worked for me. Hopefully you can take something away from this post!

  • Get up. Yep if you have anxiety induced insomnia, don’t continue to lie down stuck with your thoughts. Your mind will keep cycling all those embarrassing moments.
  • Go on your phone, watch a video, browse your favourite social media platform (if this calms you).
  • Read a book. If you enjoy reading rather than go on your phone read a book, it might help calm you down.
  • Eat something. Yes, eating late at night isn’t the best idea. However sometimes it’s needed, especially if you find comfort in food. I’m not saying binge on a lot but have a small snack to help you feel better.
  • CBD oil. While I haven’t tried it myself because it’s illegal in Australia (I think), I’ve heard about it’s therapeutic effect on anxiety. LifesfineWhine made a great post that shared the effects of it. This post actually inspired me to make this post!
  • Do whatever you chose until you feel more relaxed or pass out from exhaustion. Really any sleep is better than no sleep, so do what’s necessary.

Thanks for reading everyone! Hope you got something out of this post.

Inspiring People

Self-Discipline

Everyone gets stuck in life. You feel like you aren’t getting anywhere. You feel stuck and unmotivated to do anything. It happens to everybody at some point and the hardest thing to do, is to get out of it.

Browsing through reddit I discovered the r/selfdiscipline subreddit and I read something that makes a lot of sense. Motivation isn’t the key to changing and becoming self-disciplined, willpower is.

What is willpower? The control exerted to do something or restrain an impulse. Motivation to do something can dissolve but the will power to get up and finish that essay you’ve been procrastinating is can be trained. Developing the will power to just give it a go can help overcome the anxiety motivation brings. When you really want to try something, your mind thinks about it, gets excited and then as most humans do, we get let our mind wonder to anxious places. So, next time you have no motivation to do something, ask yourself if you have the will power to do it.

Thanks for reading!

Inspiring People

Healthy Friendships

Here is my take on a healthy friendship. A healthy friendship consists of mutual respect for each others feelings. If they do something that bothers you or vice versa, it needs to be a friendship where one feels comfortable confronting the other. Otherwise the hurt will continue and it can become toxic.

Recently, I have learned if they don’t want to make the changes or make no effort to reassure your issues then they aren’t worth your time. Friends need to be there for each other and not be toxic. Toxicity can lead to unhappiness in any relationship.

Toxicity can result in bad vibes and general sadness. It stops people from seeing the light in situations and causes them to see the negative.

Don’t let people bring you down, if someone is toxic to you then reevaluate that relationship. In the end, is it worth it?

diary · Inspiring People

Journal Writing Prompts

Journaling isn’t for everyone. It can be immensely beneficial for some and for others it may not be. For me I journal through my creativity. I create blog posts to express the emotions I keep hidden within, all while hoping I can bring advice or happiness to someone else’s day. However, writing down these emotions, whether happy or upsetting can help people understand themselves better. I also keep a physical journal, and while I don’t write in it everyday, it’s there when needed. Physical journaling helps us reflect, but it also give us something to do. Write absolutely anything. Talk crap about your favourite show or go into detail and examine every bit of its themes. You see those themes because it’s how your mind interprets it. It’s a creative outlet that allows you to explore your brain.

I wanted to share some prompts to help you journal and reflect on your emotions, as well as enable you to be grateful. Sometimes we don’t appreciate what we have.

  • How do you deal with change? Is it welcomed? Give an example.
  • What is a time in your life that you put your heart into something and no one appreciated it? How did it feel? And what were your next steps?
  • What little things bring you joy and make you calm?
  • What can you implement in your daily life to give yourself tiny bits of joy?
  • Everyone has a story. A moment in life that changed who they were, for better or for worse. What is that moment for you? And what did you learn from this?
  • Did you fulfil your previous goals in life? If not, are you okay with not achieving this goal? If yes, was that goal what you expected?
  • What show are you watching right now? What makes it appeal to you? Are there any characters you can resonate with?
  • Describe the book you’re reading. What characters can you resonate with? What themes are present?
  • What stands out to you when you take a walk on your normal route? Why?
  • If you find romance, how do you want your relationship to be? How can your partner show you respect?
  • What is your definition of a good friendship? How do you ensure you’re a good friend?
  • What’s a moment in your life that your pets have been there for you?
  • Love video games? List your favourite and the best character in them.
  • If you were to write a book or a screenplay, what would you want it to be about?

Some of these may leave you thinking ‘why would I want to write about that?’. Write about anything you want to. Journaling isn’t always supposed to be about your day. Google prompts or choose some of these, it allows you to reflect on life and also shows you where you were at a certain point in your life. I don’t know about you but I find it incredibly satisfying to look back and see who I was, as well as how far I’ve come.

Thank you all for reading! I hope you enjoyed this post.